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Posts tagged with ‘text’

I don’t really write on Tumblr ever but I was just reminded of a really weird dinner I had and I am on just the right amount of caffeine that I wanted to write about it before I forgot again. Like all my stories, it is long, goes nowhere and features several name drops.
Several years ago I met my friend Melissa who at the time was doing porn under the name Zoe Voss in Vegas at the AVN Awards. I was headed to her home of LA for a week and I had a brief crush on her and we went on a series of dates while I was in town. One of them was particularly odd. 
To start with we were meeting up with an old boyfriend of her’s from high school which was kind of awkward by itself but it was made really entertaining by the fact that this kid had pretty much never been outside of Minnesota and it was his first day in LA. We immediately took him to the infamous celebrity hot spot Chateau Marmont which is probably exactly what people from Minnesota think LA is like.
We were headed to meet James Frey. Frey is the author famous for writing a best selling memoir Million Little Pieces which he of course completely made up. He was working on a TV show about porn stars and had wanted to talk to Melissa about the porn world and to talk to her about a roll on the show. I am not 100% sure that her ex knew she did porn but he quickly found out.
At the dinner were a number of well known contemporary artists including Richard Prince. I spent some time talking to him about my exgirlfriend’s artist father and Lena Dunham’s parents. At the time Lena was just my ex’s best friend, not a huge TV star. But it was after Prince left that things got extra awkward.
Melissa and Frey were busy talking about porn and I was bored with pretending I don’t despise contemporary art so instead had a forced conversation with Melissa’s friend who’s brain was being exploded every few minutes. Aside the porn conversations and the $25 beer he had just ordered our table was sandwiched in between Katy Perry and a very sad looking Jason Segal who was drinking alone. It was his first time seeing a celebrity and for me it was the first time I had ever had to talk to a girls ex-boyfriend while on a date.
At some point Melissa brought me into her porn conversation with James and he asked if I was a porn photographer. I told him I wasn’t really a pornographer but I shot girls naked. He wanted to see what I did so I pulled out my iPad and pulled up my naked girl portfolio. He then showed each photo to the table one by one and asked me if I had slept with them or not. This went on for about 20 minutes and I think he was disappointed that hadn’t slept with more of them. 
The night ended with me realizing that my friend Mia was at dinner with Katy Perry and she was DJing at the bar downstairs so we all went down and watched her spin for a couple hours. I drove back to the apartment I was subletting only to realize that there was bomb scare on that block and I had to just sit in my rental car for an hour waiting for them to clear the scene. Good times.
End of pointless LA story. But at least you got a sexy photo of Melissa to look at right?

I don’t really write on Tumblr ever but I was just reminded of a really weird dinner I had and I am on just the right amount of caffeine that I wanted to write about it before I forgot again. Like all my stories, it is long, goes nowhere and features several name drops.

Several years ago I met my friend Melissa who at the time was doing porn under the name Zoe Voss in Vegas at the AVN Awards. I was headed to her home of LA for a week and I had a brief crush on her and we went on a series of dates while I was in town. One of them was particularly odd. 

To start with we were meeting up with an old boyfriend of her’s from high school which was kind of awkward by itself but it was made really entertaining by the fact that this kid had pretty much never been outside of Minnesota and it was his first day in LA. We immediately took him to the infamous celebrity hot spot Chateau Marmont which is probably exactly what people from Minnesota think LA is like.

We were headed to meet James Frey. Frey is the author famous for writing a best selling memoir Million Little Pieces which he of course completely made up. He was working on a TV show about porn stars and had wanted to talk to Melissa about the porn world and to talk to her about a roll on the show. I am not 100% sure that her ex knew she did porn but he quickly found out.

At the dinner were a number of well known contemporary artists including Richard Prince. I spent some time talking to him about my exgirlfriend’s artist father and Lena Dunham’s parents. At the time Lena was just my ex’s best friend, not a huge TV star. But it was after Prince left that things got extra awkward.

Melissa and Frey were busy talking about porn and I was bored with pretending I don’t despise contemporary art so instead had a forced conversation with Melissa’s friend who’s brain was being exploded every few minutes. Aside the porn conversations and the $25 beer he had just ordered our table was sandwiched in between Katy Perry and a very sad looking Jason Segal who was drinking alone. It was his first time seeing a celebrity and for me it was the first time I had ever had to talk to a girls ex-boyfriend while on a date.

At some point Melissa brought me into her porn conversation with James and he asked if I was a porn photographer. I told him I wasn’t really a pornographer but I shot girls naked. He wanted to see what I did so I pulled out my iPad and pulled up my naked girl portfolio. He then showed each photo to the table one by one and asked me if I had slept with them or not. This went on for about 20 minutes and I think he was disappointed that hadn’t slept with more of them. 

The night ended with me realizing that my friend Mia was at dinner with Katy Perry and she was DJing at the bar downstairs so we all went down and watched her spin for a couple hours. I drove back to the apartment I was subletting only to realize that there was bomb scare on that block and I had to just sit in my rental car for an hour waiting for them to clear the scene. Good times.

End of pointless LA story. But at least you got a sexy photo of Melissa to look at right?

Pretty into Tumblr’s Pro April Fool’s joke. All my posts have top hats now! I hope I get to keep my top hats forever!

I Guess I'm Straight Edge? | NOISEY →

This Dan Ozzi article on Straight Edge is pretty perfect and a lot of how I feel about my semi-SXE lifestyle. 

When my friends started drinking at 12 I didn’t cause alcoholism runs in my family and my dad had some problems and my parents always stressed not drinking. It’s sort of weird thinking about it now but it seemed like a really long time from 12-14 when I would get made fun of for not drinking like my cooler tween friends. But when I was 14 I found out about Straight Edge. 

Minor Threat wrote songs about not drinking and doing drugs and having causal sex because you are fucking up your life and not getting interesting shit done. Finally I had a good reason that I didn’t drink. I found a way to be “cool” and not drink warm Budweiser that my friends had stolen from their parents. I was Straight Edge.

I was a punk kid and hated most hardcore so I mostly just hung out with punk kids that drank and did drugs and all that shit. It was a personal choice for me and most of my friends excepted it. It wasn’t until I was 18 and 19 and started listening to a lot more hardcore straight edge stuff and I started hanging out with more straight edge kids.

Turns out straight edge kids are fucking assholes. These guys almost all jocks that somehow made a wrong turn somewhere. Just total bros who just wanted to get into my face because I ate meat or hung out with kids who got fucked up all the time. I have no fucking clue what eating meat has to do with straight edge and I don’t know why the hell you need to tell other people to live their life. That shit was bullshit.

When I was 19 when I dropped the label straight edge because I didn’t want to be associated with those assholes. 

Somewhere along the line I got addicted to women and it certainly became a crutch in my life. I think that it’s honestly a real problem for me and I understand why casual sex was one of the original tenements of straight edge. For some reason no straight edge kids pay attention to that one… they replaced it with meat and Advil or some bullshit. 

Anyway, this is rambling and unorganized but I still have those same straight edge values that I had at 14 (except for the women thing, god dammit). I drink on rare occasions and I have tried a few drugs in my life and under the right situation I might do some more, but these things don’t control my life. They don’t fuck up my life.

To me straight edge should be about personal choice and it should be about moderation. And these bros that want to start a fight about it or bomb a McDonalds can go fuck themselves.

xIgorx 

Got my road trip edit down to 950 Route 66 photos and 200 non-Route 66 photos. That is fucking insane. So much fun stuff coming to Tumblr next week…
I’ll get a few things up this weekend but I am going on vacation to recover from my vacation. 

Got my road trip edit down to 950 Route 66 photos and 200 non-Route 66 photos. That is fucking insane. So much fun stuff coming to Tumblr next week…

I’ll get a few things up this weekend but I am going on vacation to recover from my vacation. 

Film’s A Comin’!*

I dropped off 66 rolls of film from my road today and on Friday I get to pick them up assuming I can pay them $900 dollars to get them developed. 

The price of film and film development these days is absurd but I took it to a great place (Luster in NYC) and they will give me high res scans that I can turn into a zine and other rad things. I will be posting a ton of stuff on Tumblr as well so you guys can enjoy that. 

End of post.

*Keep in mind that apostrophe is not to express the possesive but to replace the letter “i” in Film Is A Coming which I realize is terrible grammar to begin with. 

I wish people would ask me more weird questions on Tumblr or send me hate mail or love letters or something. I need attention Tumblr!

Tagged: Driven By Boredom →

I don’t know why I never checked out the Driven By Boredom tag on Tumblr before… Glad to see at least some people on Tumblr give credit for photos…

Die Tumblr Die!

Tumblr is really making me want to kick babies at the moment. Why do you guys post such bullshit all the time? The things that get rebloged 10,000 times are always the most worthless garbage that was just stolen from someone else to begin with. Fucking create something you assholes.

The Miskha Bloglin was my 4000th Tumblr follower. I suport that.

What the fuck is a sissywiddle?

Send more hate mail.